Tuesday, January 08, 2008

The Trouble With Narcotics

The following comes from one of my field reporters (my cousin, Lori) in the Nashville area. The subject, Leigh, is her sister (and also my cousin). I have neither amended nor embellished this report. I have placed this in my "I can't make up this stuff" file...

Recently Leigh had the misfortune of falling victim to yet another violent crime. This girl can’t catch a break. She was working her regular shift at the CVS/pharmacy in Homewood when a lady pulled up to the drive-through window. This lady requested to pick up several of her prescriptions one of which was a narcotic. Leigh located all of the customer’s prescriptions except the narcotic. When Leigh questioned the pharmacist regarding the location of the missing prescription she was informed that the customer had just had the drug refilled two days prior and that she would have to wait several more days before she could have it again.
Leigh then walked to the window and told the customer why her narcotic was not available. The customer then became irate and started screaming at her. Also in the car with the customer was her child who sat in the backseat snacking on a box of teddy grahams. Displeased with the news she had just received from Leigh the customer then snatched the teddy grahams away from her child and shoved her hand down into the box as she continued to scream at Leigh.

Before Leigh knew what was happening the customer began throwing handfuls of teddy grahams into her face. Unfortunately her quick thinking did not kick in because she was pummeled with three handfuls of the tasty snack before it occurred to her to close the window and she didn’t even think to pull her glasses down on her nose and say, “Oh yeah.” Once she closed the window the customer continued to hurl teddy grahams at it to no avail.

Although my sister was hit several times she escaped with only minor injuries. Had the police been called I think the news story would have ready something like this, “Officer Jones was quoted as saying that this was the worst teddy grahaming since the infamous teddy grahaming of 1988…but it could’ve been a lot worse.”

So, a word to the wise, be careful out there on the streets because you never know when you will be the victim of a drive-by teddy grahaming.